Rehydration of an Ancient King

Mood Music

 When last we met our heroes, they continued their exploration of the Last Serai that stands on the border of the territory of the Porcelain Princes and the Spectrum Satraps.

 They concluded deals with the Satraps, purchasing purified water to resuscitate their dessicated king; and with the Porcelain Princes to buy batteries. The latter deal evolved into a shotgun sale when the heroes didn't like the price of battery to fuel converters.

 Rehydration of the ancient King complete, the team were dismayed that he had lost his memory and forgotten the prophesy he had travelled to the future to deliver. A physical examination led them to believe a dream eater may have been responsible so they did what heroes do best and headed out to the bar.

 Talking to patrons at the milk bar turned up few leads. The Porcelain Princes were rumoured to use trained dream eaters in their clandestine schemes, but no-one had seen a dream eater lately. Pooki's pet half-orc suggested that the group

  Pooki's pet half-orc suggested the "purveyor of fine meats" at the Buried Delicatessen hidden in the foundations of the Serai.

 On the way back to their digs, the heroes noticed the vomish assassin laying an ambush for Midori. They decided to turn the tables with an ambush of their own with Midori as the bait. The turned tables were turned again when the vome unleashed a pair of mechanical spiders. Midori fought her way free and the heroes ended the vomish menace.

 Delving deep underground the heroes found and were admitted to the delicatessen where they met Anise of Star and her accountant-monk business partner. Declining the offer of a full brain refurb the group took a cheaper tune up for the ancient king of the moon mountains. Midori also took advantage of Anise's Ka-Box to get a full week's rest in just am hour. The team got a good price after the accountant-monks negotiated a price in the ritual duelling rites if the green god of greed.

 The next day the team returned to the delicatessen to retrieve their king. His memory restored he told of the prophesy, told to him by the elves, of a great machine demon lurking within the near moon, that would arise and destroy all of the rainbow lands!

Enhanced Intestinal Microflora

Mood Music

 When last we met our heroes the sallied forward, hangovers raging, to the Last Serai.

 A little over a week later they saw it - a metallic stepped tower, glowing a coppery green by night. Closing in they found three buildings - the great tower the Harmonium of the Porcelain Princes, the second the final embassy if the spectrum satraps, the third the last trading house of the Violet City. In the distance, the Ignored Tower stood ominously.

 The heroes secured lodgings in the trading house and an audience with the chief of the Rainbow mission, a pure white fluffy cat named Pooki. Delivering their precious cargo of cat coffee the heroes learned that Pooki wanted one last big deal to return to the Violet City. Would the heroes be prepared to steal great prismatic crystals from the satraps for her?

 Mulling on this the heroes headed to the Giving Cow, the local milk bar run by Zuna Namelost. Supping their biomantically modified udder beast milk they had three encounters:

 1) Drunk traders from the orange and yellow land led by Mila Yaga who let slip that they had a map of secret ways through the Spectrum Crossing.

 2) a mind-burned vome-infected thief that wanted the map for The Original Jane.

 3) none other than Lady Satrasco who, fleeing debt collectors, was heading to the Black City to acquire a *Null Object Of Desire*.

 After some reticence, Lady Satrasco accepted her countdom from Mint, but was not dissuaded from her quest and Midori declined to help the vome thief.

 Somewhat high on high lactose beverages but with improved intestinal microflora, had some difficulty finding their lodgings and ended up in a store room with boxes floor to ceiling of potatoes and light bulbs, behind which they found an ancient sarcophagus containing cryo-dehydrated abmortal remains that Laurel recognised as King Elre the Dreaming - a legend from her native Moon mountains. The tale went that Elre voyaged to future to warn his descendents of a great danger. The heroes decided to rehydrate the King and find out what was up!

 While the others proposed various hairbrained schemes to move the huge sarcophagus, Midori scouted ahead to find their actual rooms. On her way back to the storeroom she was ambushed by the vomish thief who was incensed that she would not help with his plan. Barely escaping, Midori rejoined the others and after some back breaking effort they secured the sarcophagus.

 The next day the heroes made an appointment with Angel 22-Unity to discuss the purchase of some batteries. They also visited to Final Embassy where they met with Satrap 13 'Ahab' and purchased purified water for their dessicated king.

 Join us tonight for the next thrilling installment of the Ultraviolet Grasslands. Will the heroes take up Pooki's quest? Will they revive the long entombed king of the moon mountains? Will the vome thief strike again? And what other wonders and horrors lurk in the Last Serai?!

Chillax

Mood Music

 When last we met our heroes, they finished up a week if kicking back and relaxing at Lady Satrasco's country estate, loaded up their camels with her best stuff, and headed back out into the Potsherd Crater.

 After a second lazy afternoon among the psychedelic poison flowers the heroes made a detour to the chromium dome that a quarterling hermit had told them about.

 The dome was indeed very shiny, but with no obvious way inside. Azure tried yeeting Mint onto the top where he found a pride of bat-lions sunning themselves. The heroes decided not to bother them and moved on.

 On their way back to the Porcelain Citadel, our group had a nighttime run in with a group of vomes backed up by some kind of floating vomish drone. The vomes were soon overrun and Sage scaled some cabling to engage the drone in high altitude combat. Between his flurry of blows and Laurel's archery they laid the drone low and finished their journey.

 On the heroes return to the citadel of the Porcelain Princes, Midori engaged in some frenzied negotiations, offloading furniture to a delighted Jonky Bonko, collecting illicit money from Syruss Sensible for their fenced suncream, and investing in an epic camel for herself.

 Then the whole group got down to some serious partying - a week of hard hedonism that scored them variously; a small Porcelain Walker; shares in a Cherenkov vodka distillery; membership to a non-existent secret society (complete with horrifying arcane knowledge); and robbed and left half naked in a ditch with a dead vome.

 Sobering up the heroes decided to make for the Last Serai with the intention of delivering their cat coffee and making it back to the Violet City before winter arrives.

A House In The Country

Mood Music

When last we met our heroes, defeating their nomad assailants, finally crested the lip and entered the Potsherd Crater.

By nightfall they reached the waterlogged quarry the mad quarterling hermit had told them about. As promised, the quarry was overgrown with thorny edible vines and sharp long grass. That night they were attacked by grotesque poisonous toads that live in the waterlogged depths, but they were easily driven off. In the morning, the heroes identified that valuable sanguine porcelain could still be extracted from the quarry, but they eagerly hurried on to the object of their quest: The pleasure palace of the wealthy merchant and unwitting count, Lady Satrasco.

Despite their eagerness to get to the Manor, they weren't in such a hurry that they didn't spend an extra day in an ecstatically beautiful (but quite allergy inducing) flower patch.

When they arrived, the heroes found the grand gateway lying open and the princely estate overgrown with long grass, reeds and fragrant lotus.

The place seemed abandoned, with the wind spirit guardians freed, the servants' cottages pristine and untouched, and a disabled autogolem in the garage.

Entering the house and doing their best to not worry too much about the ominous howls and massive clawed footprints they'd found, the heroes found room after room beautifully decorated in the ancient Brutalist style of the Second Para-Dadaism. They found evidence of an inexpertly cooked meal piled high in the kitchens, and a small museum that had been ransacked, but only the small valuable items were missing.

Finally, heading upstairs they found a retro-Futurist dining room, complete with far-seeing sculpture-cube. However, as they enjoyed the panoramic view of the gardens, the heroes noticed shaggy forms with slavering teeth and glowing eyes emerging from the long grass.

What will happen in the next thrilling installment!! Of the Ultraviolet Grasslands!!!

Cliff Hanger

Mood Music

We rejoin the heroes in a perilous situation high on the lip of the Potsherd Crater. On a treacherous pathway up a porcelain ridge, Sage and Azure do deadly battle with a nomad leader. A dizzying 50 feet above, Laurel faces down two nomads,  whilst Mint clings desperately to the cliff face half way between the two. Midori, guarding the caravan, provides fire support.

 How did it come to this?

 Nine days earlier, the heroes had been carousing at the tavern Your Life Burns Faster In This House. Having been declared "his kind of crazy" by the manager and potentially retired freebooter Syruss Sensible, and "pseudo-dwarves" by the red district radicals hiding out in the backroom. 2400gp on the bar tab, a deal to fence their illegal sunscreen, and Groat the goat on stage providing vocals,  life was looking pretty sweet.

 Then the heroes heeded the call of adventure. Jonky Bonko - porcelain prince go between and furniture fighter - told them that Satrasco - Yellow Lily Consortium merchant and subject of Mint's quest - had built an oldtech pleasure estate out in the Potsherd Crater before going missing and probably being killed. Whether it was the prospect of delivering Mint's letter or the prospect of some easy loot, the heroes formed up their caravan and headed for the crater.

 At the foot of the crater, the heroes befriended a wretched quarterling hermit Indigo Cerulean. Whilst Indigo attempted to convince them the world was a simulation Sage traded hard drugs for hard information. In addition to the precise location of the pleasure estate, they learned of a waterlogged quarry with edible long-grass, a mysterious chromium dome, and a mad autofarm that might of interest to explorers.

 Finally, on the slippery porcelain lip of the crater, the heroes were confronted by a group of nomads that claimed the crater for themselves. Unmoved by Azure's tales of alliance with the lime, lemon and tangerine tribes, the nomads opened fire with bows, arrows, and a giant porcelain boulder, and here we are.

 Now the thrilling end to the encounter!

The Hottest BBQ in the West

Gaining access to the biomechanical baobab tree encampment, the heroes spoke with the matriarch of the Green Tangerine Nomads and secured a promise of their help against the vomes at Verdegris Ribs. They then spent a week carousing, in which Laurel won a new golem pet whilst gambling, and Sage was run out of town accused of cheating.

The heroes ventured deeper into the Ultraviolet Grasslands. 9 gruelling days descending from the steppe was punctuated only by Azure humorously ripping his pants when sitting down on a cinder slag, until the caravan met a lone merchant, Giorrodi Spada, travelling in the other direction. After sharing information about the road ahead, they shared a camp for the night. It was not until the early hours of the morning that they discovered that Giorrodi was a vomish infiltrator and had infected Midori with thd vome source code, much to Jane-John's delight.

The heroes finally reached the porcelain citadel, home of the porcelain princes. Passing under the watchful eyes of the column defence golems, they stabled their camels in the Princes' serai and found accommodation in the yellow guesthouse run by Tan Biscotti.

Hitting up the House of the Unbowed Cardinal they partook of the hottest bbq in the west and heard rumours of a grass cult amongst the otherwise fruity nomads.

On their way to seek out Jonky Bonko, a furniture maker and popular tourist guide, the heroes ran into Clayfire 100-Company, a self-appointed one-prince militia who demanded to inspect their wares.

Through stealth and diplomacy the heroes hid their contraband sunscreen, but were forced to sell their scrap metal at a discount. They also found out that Satrasco - wealthy merchant of the Yellow Lily Consortium - had left the citadel to build a pleasure estate out at the Potsherd Cratar.